DMB Concert

Alright, now this is clearly a past due post seeing as the concert took place back in August, but I still wanted to get it out here...

So I went with the "G Man" to the Dave Matthews Band concert on August 31. It was a nasty ass hot Phoenix day, but the music was fantastic!

Here is a list of what he played in the order that he played them (some song names may not be correct).

1) Everyday
2) Dreamgirl
3) Stand Up
4) Say Goodbye
5) Great Escape
6) O Great Light Of Love
7) Crash
8) I'm A Smooth Rider
9) #34
10) Stay
11) Seek Up
12) Dancing Nancies
13) Down On The Bayou
14) Ants Marching
15) Encore
16) You Might Die Trying
17) What You Are

Super Bowl XL

Alright, the time has come. I have waited ten years to return back to the Super Bowl and now it's finally happened. I'm up at 2:40 in the morning waiting for kickoff like a kid would wait for Christmas morning. Oh, and I have a score for you... 31-17 Steelers win Super Bowl XL and Jerome Bettis retires a champion!!!

Did you know???

Did you know that

Giving head massages the jaw....while burning 32 calories.

Swallowing foreign body juices is actually like taking vitamins and it whitens your teeth

Having nice sex burnes 358 calories.

Having rough sex [make it hurt] burns 543 calories.


Take off her clothes
with her consent.........................12 cal
without..................................187 cal

Take off her Bra
With two hands............................8 cal
With one hand............................12 cal
With mouth...............................85 cal

Put on Protection
hard ......................................6 cal
soft.....................................315 cal

Foreplay
Looking for target.......................8 cal
Finding G spot .........................92 cal
I don't F***ing care......................0 cal

Entry
Holding her.............................12 cal
On the floor..............................8 cal

With Different Position
Missionary.............................358 cal
Doggy..................................316 cal
69 lying................................286 cal
69 standing............................512 cal
Italian hanger.........................912 cal

Orgasm
Real...................................112 cal
Faking.................................315 cal
Real Great.............................900 cal

After "O"
Lying in Bed..............................18 cal
Hop off the bed...........................36 cal
Wondering why she left pissed off......816 cal


Get dressed
Quiet and calm...........................32 cal
Rushing...................................98 cal
Heard her boyfriend opening the door.............1218 cal
Heard her dad/2 yr old baby sista at the door.............1942 cal

Upset???

Well, let me start off by saying that I hate the damn patriots, and I (at least for the most part) hate anyone and everyone that likes the Pats or even has an affiliation with Boston. I have yet to meet a person from that damn city that I like. Apparently, everyone from that city is the toughest guy in the world and is dying to prove it... and as if that's not bad enough, they’re convinced that Boston is the best city in the world... IT'S NOT!

Now back on track... well, every season I make my "upset pick(s)" for the upcoming season. Basically, I make a bold and "ballsy" prediction as to what the end result of an NFL team or player will be. In the past, I have told these Nostradamus like predictions only to the likes of my friends and family, but now they will be publicly available to anyone who wishes to read them and place their bets accordingly. This year I have two upsets that will shock the hell out of you.

#1 - The New England Patriots will finish NO BETTER than 11-5 and will not win their division.

#2 - The Arizona Cardinals will win their division and will make the playoffs for the first time since 1997.

Now many of you are laughing hysterically right now... well settle down! I am rarely wrong about these predictions and don't intend on starting now. Let's talk facts... the Patriots have managed to scrape and manipulate their way to 3 out of the last 4 Super Bowls on nothing other than pure luck. They are a mediocre team that plays well together because they have good coaching. Well, that has come to an end! Romeo Crennel, their former defensive coordinator has left Massachusetts for the hapless Cleveland Browns, while Charlie Weiss has flown the coop for a head coaching job at Notre Dame. For the last several years, and through all of their Super Bowl success, they have had one thing if nothing else... consistency! Losing your offensive and defensive coordinators in the same off-season doesn't bode well for consistency. Not to mention the departure of Ted Washington, Tedy Bruschi, and Ty Law... is any of this devastating to you? To top it all off, my procrastination in posting this allowed me to see them in action last Thursday night. Can you say PATHETIC! They had a fair amount of trouble dealing with the disciplineLESS Raiders, a team that was 5-11 a year ago! They will not be a superior team this year, and if I get my wish, they will not even make the playoffs. Over the next two weeks they have to play the Super Bowl favorite (by many) Carolina Panthers, and then travel to Pittsburgh to face the team that god built!

Alright alright, I'll leave those pathetic Patriots alone for a second while I talk about my "new" home team, the Arizona Cardinals. When they secured Dennis Green as their head coach last year, I said "give him three years and he will make them competitive". Well, it's year two and he will send them to the playoffs, and possibly next year, after a few key acquisions to be named later, will send them to the promised land (deep into the playoffs). Dennis Green is a coaching genius and will go great things for the Cardinals much to the dismay of residents of Arizona. Notice that I said "residents of Arizona" and NOT "Cardinals fans" because there aren't any. For one thing, very few people that live here were actually born here, thus nullifying the term "home team", not to mention the frickin' mess that I fell witness to last year when the Suns went deep into the playoffs and all of a sudden tickets were selling like hot cakes. Tickets should be selling whether a team is winning or losing, not only when they win. It sickens me to hear anyone talk about a sports franchise only after they become a competitor, we have a name for that… bandwagon fans! I will stop here and save my anger here for a different rant.

Well, there you go, my two upsets of the year. So get your wallets out and start placing your bets. If you're smart, you'll agree with my predictions and wager accordingly, but if you chose not to... you’re probably a bandwagon Patriots fan, or worse yet, actually born and raised in Boston!

See, it's more than just low calorie... it's low carb too! 

Quote of the day

I work; therefore I drink

- EssentialJJ (2005)

Ground Zero... "we will never forget".

The Empire State Building in all it's glory! 

NYC post... done right!

Okay, now that I've got the hang of the whole "blogging" thing, let's take another look at last weekends New York trip, with appropriate verbage.

Day 0-1... I decide not to sleep on Wednesday night so that I can pass out for the entire flight to New York... did my plan get fucked! First, I end up sitting next to some foreign guy that wanted to chat it up the whole way there. Now anyone that knows me knows that I sure don't mind talking...to people that I know! So in a feeble attempt to tune the guy out, I put on my headphones and try to catch some ZZZ's. I'm just about to enter those lucious gates to dreamland when this incessant little bastard taps me on the shoulder and tells me that he has to pee. Needless to say, I wasn't amused. Repeat this procedure one or two more times over an approximately five hour period and you have my flight. We head to the Comedy Cellar in Soho for some low key entertainment. It's nice to hear that other guys in the world are occasionally as angry as me.



Day 2... The foursome splits up even before I can peel the crap out of my eyes. The two more, let's just say, 'hetero-ly' challenged guys embark on a day full of shopping and facials. I on the other hand am looking for some steak and eggs and a nice titty club. The latter of the two didn't quite mesh with the plans of my female traveler, thus, were benched. As I traveled the streets of Times Square I proceeded to capture the 'finer' of New York City's sights (over and over again). After managing to score some tickets to a Yankees vs. Red Sox game, we jumped on the subway to head towards the Bronx. The game was easily the best part of the entire trip as I got to see one of the greatest rivalries in all of sports! It didn't hurt that the Yankees handed those Boston bastards their asses either.

Day 3... The foursome was reunited for a final day of sightseeing throughout Manhattan. We checked out Ground Zero, Battery Park, Central Park, and more of Times Square. All along the way, I continued to capture New York's finest attractions. While catching a late lunch on the East Side, I saw some things that you just don't see everyday. The one that sticks out in my mind, other than the guy in a red unitard and cape and a black 'zorro' mask nearly J-walking, was a homeless guy that decided to get into a staring contest with me while tugging on his naughty place! I'm telling you, this guy was going to town, simply pulling on himself with such determination that his pant legs actually lifted up a good six to nine inches! Of course I gawked and took more pictures of the Manhattan penis puller as he continued to become more perturbed. We rounded out the evening at a place I could call home... ESPN Zone! We watched the Suns vs. Spurs game. Unfortunately the game did not yield the desired outcome, but there was some nice 'scenery' at the zone.

Day 4... After waking up with less than an hour for four people to shower, pack, and get the hell out of the hotel room, we hurried a bit...and still weren't out in time. The three smarter members of the crew pulled their luggage (via handlebars) down the streets of Manhattan with ease, while I lumbered an overpacked full size duffle bag over my shoulder for what seemed to be an eternity. We grabbed some lunch and took the LIRR back to Islip where we caught our flight home via a stop in Nashville. The guys took in a Tennessee beer at a Titans/Predators sports bar at the airport before embarking on the remaining nearly four hour flight home. One of our members took a nap on all three seats while the rest of us conveniently forgot to tell him to buckle up upon landing... he had a warm wakeup.